Barwest Restaurant - Sacramento

Stop Reading The Newspaper And Tabloids

95. Stop reading the newspaper and tabloids.

I am going to apologize in advance to the feelings this may hurt or to any of those in the print media. (Understanding the success of this book may depend upon periodical reviews, I may be biting the hand that would inevitably feed me, but I am obligated to tell you the truth.) In my experience the people who need the most help are those who make a daily ritual of reading the newspaper or subscribing to tabloids. There, I said it; now let me do my best to explain why.

For starters, the first complaint I hear from many is the lack of time they have to do the things they know they need to do. These would include reading books, exercising, taking time for themselves, and working on their own lives. Those who engage in reading the daily paper take time from other aspects of their lives that could be used to reach goals and improve overall happiness. Many claim they are hindered by money. Regardless of how cheap they can make a subscription to a local or national paper, this cost could be applied to other areas of necessity.

There is the issue of bias. Most modern day publications are no longer objective, thereby leading to their inevitable failure. Understanding that there are two sides to every issue, if only one side is mostly represented, the other side will simply stop reading and stop buying. Many people have said to me, “How will I know what is going on?” I would say in my experience, if there is something I need to know, most people will be talking about it. Reminding myself of issues that everyone already knows exist does little to help the problem and improve my personal growth.

Also, if we are trying to become more green and reduce waste, does this form of information make any sense? Doesn’t it contradict this new paradigm shift? Most importantly, garbage in, garbage out; meaning, you ultimately choose what you decide to put in your head. Unless you are a stock broker, why would you ever read the business section? Leave that to an expert who does that for a living and give yourself the headspace to work on more important things, namely yourself.

There are only two ways I know of to make you feel better. You can work on yourself and do the best you can to improve your situation, or you can concentrate on the downfalls of others to keep yourself above them. This is the only thing I can think of that fuels the existence of tabloid media. Focusing on the flaws of others distracts us from our own shortcomings and provides us with an excuse in meeting our own hopes and dreams. Can you imagine the difference we could make by having positive books or messages at the checkout counter? Instead we are bombarded with who looks better in a particular dress or who has put on the most weight. What if we had fruit instead of candy at checkout?

Life is not only about identifying where you want to go and what you want to be. It is also about avoiding pitfalls along the way. Every time you go to the store, they have two huge landmines right in your way. It’s no wonder we are so distracted. This Tool is not about having your head in the sand, but understanding that what you may be reading has your entire MIND in quicksand. You now understand that you choose where you decide to step.

For Those Who Believe, No Proof Is Needed

53. For those who believe, no proof is needed and for those who don’t, no proof is enough.

If you decide to apply the principles presented to you in this book, I believe this is a Tool you will need to incorporate at sometime when using this system. This is an adaptation of a quote by Stuart Chase and it needs little explanation. We all know these people, no matter how many studies, how much information, or how many experts there are, they will never believe what you believe. The reason this is so crucial to understand is that you can waste valuable time and energy trying to convince someone of something that they will never understand. Taking time and energy trying to persuade someone of something they refuse to understand takes time away from reaching the levels we are setting to achieve.

You will run into many who say it doesn’t work. They will try to do their best to make you think that your beliefs are silly and a waste of time. Your focus needs to be on building your house, not trying to explain to others how you are building your house. The only proof you need is how your house is ultimately coming together. Your job is not to prove what you are building, but to stay true to what you are building. If you need assurance that you are on the right track, the people trying to stall your project will have nothing they are building.

The people who try to ruin your dreams should be thought of as a demolition crew waiting to demolish what you are trying to create. How else could you explain it? If you are trying to reach your dreams and goals, what kind of person would try to stall your blueprint for success? Constantly remind yourself that you are a hammer and that as a hammer, you are building but may miss your mark now and then. Take comfort in knowing that as a hammer you are building, and those who refuse to build their own lives can only feel good about their lack of progress by trying to sabotage yours. Your job as a hammer is to build and help others become hammers, but you never sidetrack your progress on those who refuse to accept your help.

Stop Stomping On Sandcastles

83. Stop stomping on sandcastles.

We all remember back in the day playing at the park in the sandbox. After taking some time and a little effort we had constructed a beautiful sandcastle that we were excited for all to see. Most of our classmates congratulated us on our achievements and encouraged us to keep building. But there was always that one kid who shortly after sharing your new creation found the need to go Godzilla on your sand sculpture and stomp all over it causing it to come crashing down. I always remember thinking as that kid walked away with a smile, why would someone do that to someone else? Nothing hinders personal growth as much as hindering other people’s growth.

Sometimes when we aren’t in a very good place in our lives, the only way we think we can make ourselves feel better is to bring others down to our level. If we are having trouble reaching success, we find it necessary to criticize the success of others. It is a defense mechanism we use to explain why we avoid trying to build our lives. For example, if you were to get a new car that you were proud of and your friend found the need to tell you all the problems and costs associated with that car, it is their way of avoiding striving for success. Simply put, they associate success with additional problems and responsibilities. It is just easier to find a way to bring others down than try to reach success of their own.

By starting the process of being happy for others and the things that they achieve, you will begin to associate success with good feelings and relinquish the bad thoughts you have trained yourself to feel. We have just discussed the benefit of forming a Master Mind group which benefits us by teaming up with others to reach new levels. By congratulating others and showing true excitement for their achievements, they are much more likely to include you in future endeavors. They may also share with you some of the secrets they have learned that have helped them along the way. One thing is for sure, if you are in the habit of stomping on people’s sandcastles, at some point they just won’t show you them anymore.